A return to the Record Collector singles bar for the defiant Frankie Machine, and not at all as pretentious as the title might suggest. "I only want to drink your blood" he virtually whimpers on the A-Side "No Love Boat". No changes there then from the Frankie Machine of old, who is still combining his unique brand of plectrum-less, bass-less strumming with acerbic wit. The B-Side "Happy/Sadistic" finds a great mix of electronica too, with backwards synth beats and childhood whispers complimenting lyrics like "I only wish that people wouldn't judge me on the trail of destruction I've left behind me". Very, very special, like a secret on vinyl.

Record Collector November 2000

Pressed on the heaviest vinyl I have ever had the pleasure to put on my turntable, this dinky little brown vinyl 7" from the Artists Against Success label is a real treat for those of us who are sick of the current crop of angst ridden boys with loud electric guitars. You know, all attitude and no feeling. According to the Frankie Machine web site this disc was made without the aid of Bass, Electric Guitars or Plectrums. "No Love Boat" starts with some manicly scratchy violin and then gradually eases itself into a soulful and fragile acoustic tune with wistful and yearning vocals. As the press release says it's a real Saturday night alone with your-self tune, sorry for itself with out wallowing in it. The second side is a bit more out there, welding mutant Bossa drum machine rhythms to more of the sensitive and restrained playing of Frankie. Definitely a single to look out for, forget the cod angst of Coldplay and the like, this is surely music that wears its heart proudly on its sleeve

Acid Attack webzine Dec 2000

On the thickest of Brown Vinyl, Frankie Machine confuse us with a strange montage thaang before lapsing into a good old melancholy singer-songwriter dirge. Side 2 is pretty dour too, tho it does brighten up a little - only to end with a creepy church bell. Super!!

Here Be Monsters Fanzine Spring 2001

This EP starts and finishes with a slightly jarring, curious cacophony of samples and instruments, like a whole band tuning up badly all at once, that doesn’t fit in at all with the beauty between these bursts of noise. Because here we have two of the most fragile, beautiful, and graceful little songs this side of Trembling Blue Stars. ‘No Love Boat’ is a subtle, lilting little number, with a carefully plucked guitar providing perfect accompaniment to haunting vocals in a sad, gorgeous, moving little love song. Even the odd little sample that plays between verses seems to work to make the whole experience humbling, adorable. This is backed by the equally fantastic ‘Happy/Sadistic’. Slightly more adventurous in its structure, in that the track breaks down completely midway through then whispers back into life, the song nevertheless deserves to be championed in cramped little bedsits everywhere. A quiet, shy and truly outstanding little gem of a record.

Strange Fruit December 2000

Following the debut single, ‘Why Are You?’, it’s nearly impossible to imagine a work more beautiful. Yet here we have just that, proving the might of this machine. Reduced to just eight minutes, but exuding more warmth through the intimacy of the production (and packaging) than is even possible to imagine. Both ‘No Love Boat’ and ‘Happy/Sadistic’ evoke feelings of empathy and sadness through the great simplicity; expressing both innocence and experience in a single carefully constructed phrase. Transcending emotions thorough the interweaving words, music, and sound effects, this epic is in the vein of a classical masterpiece. Despite lyrically showing despair, musically the rays of hope spring from the darkness and that’s what make it all so special. ‘The Cartesian Product EP’ is not just a music record, it is life transforming.

Kiss & Tell Webzine January 2001

Frankie Machine is the alter ego of a man called Francis Albert Machine and his name made you think "so what?, never heard from him." But so far he's already been involved in bands like White Town, Airport Girl or MJ Hibbett & The Validators. The label said it was soul music and it is Please don't think of Marvin Gaye or so, but what they mean is that you can hear someone who is making music that comes from the soul.a sort of troubadour who's armed with a minimum of instruments (so you won't hear a symphony-orchestra on here) but who is saying more than most other artists simply cos it's so effective. Because of the mood, lots of people will compare this to artists like Nick Drake or Tim Buckley (or for those who have lost any kind of imagination.Bob Dylan) but that really isn't the case. You know, I even tend to say this is a lo-fi version from The Lightning Seeds or something like that. It's qualitypop but made with the most essential instrument an artist can make use of : the heart!!!

The Original Sin fanzine Issue 32

Not strictly a review of the single but a review of the Bath Moles gig we did to promote the record:

Bath Moles Club
2nd Nov 2000
The night is opened by Derby's Frankie Machine, who ease the crowd in gently with their acoustic, drummerless set. Part of the "quiet revolution", comparisons with Belle and Sebastian or a stripped down Delgados are inevitable.

Bath University Impact Magazine November 2000